Introversion: Coffee and Cigarettes and Anorexia

Coffee and Cigarettes are best when shared with you. We'll go to Waffle House or your mom's house,

and share a cup or two. Yeah, I have friends, but they have friends, and they have parties, and I'm so akward. So what do you say, just as friends, we see a movie this weekend, alright?

Okay. - Coffee and Cigarettes by NeverShoutNever

Guitarist other brother this past Summer<3

Well, this idea isn't exactly mine. I've decided to start adding a few song lyrics in here. Music is a ginormous part of my life (as I play the piano and grew up surrounded by my brother's instruments of all sorts), so I think it is only logical to post some of the words that have created a big impact, support, or just down right happiness for me.

Now, this idea did come partially from The OCD Diaries' Mood Music.

So, this blog post is going out to disorders evoked by society. I feel it is only right to use a quote from Demi Lovato's song Lightweight. This song mostly comes across as a love song. However, with farther investigation, I do believe it has a lot to do with society (afterall, songs mean something else to every listener). I believe Demi is the object of society. She loves society by means of appreciation, because it tells her where she is in life. It tells her if she is too thin, too fat, too ugly, too stupid. And therefore, it doesn't let her "fall", because she thinks it is nice having a constant telling her what she needs to do to become more popular.

This is actually unfortunate. While it seems like having something telling you what you could do to be better, its term of "better" is more like "unhealthy but worth it*". She loves the way society makes her feel, because it helps her be more comfortable in her actions. However, with few words, society hurts her and causes her to feel broken (AKA, starved from BDD).

(Here, I have italicized the words I believe show how society hurts her.)

I'm a lightweight,

Better be careful what you say.

With every word

I'm blown away.

You're in control of my heart.

I'm a lightweight,

Easy to fall, easy to break.

With every move my whole world shakes.

Keep me from falling apart. . . .

Could this really be

A safe place to fall? . . .

Do you even know

How you make me weak?

Me: Where have all the flowers gone?

Society: We have a great variety of pollen free roses.

Me: Where have all the fathers gone?

Society: Women can do everything a man can.

Me: Where has all the talent gone?

Society: You have more flexibility with synthesizers and animation, you know.

Me: Where has all the color gone?

Society: It's only black and white arguments now, deer.

Me: Where has all the food gone?

Society: There's a fast food resaurant just down the street.

Me: Where has all the brilliance gone?

Society: This is Google, Bing, eHow, Wikipedia, Ask, and Yahoo. Take your pick.

Me: Where have all the words gone?

Society: Texting is much faster.

Me: Where have all the people gone?

Society: Plastic is perfect.

- Me, ha ha

When you think you're fat, your first instict is do anythign to get thin. Hasn't everyone heard of survival of the fittest?

You really just need to go to a friend. On the way to their house, you pass up a CVS with magazines in the window.

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You sit on the curb and cry. McDonald's is across the road from you, and you can't resist. Eating your feelings? You were taught how to do that. Don't think it's nataural. When sad, you recieved candy as a kid. Your mom showed you how chocolate releases endorfens when you hit puberty. You know comfort in food. Before you know it, you've downed a whole large strawberry malt.

You feel sick. You look down and imagine your thighs already closing the gap between them. You rush to the bathroom with your finger wiggling down your throat.

Pain but for no gain.

ANOREXIA NERVOSA, BULIMIA NERVOSA, BINGE EATING WILL DESTROY YOU.

Inside to the outside, from body to brains, you will be ruined.

Long terms effects include:

Kidney failure. Liver failure.
Blurred vision. Cataracts.

Loss of voice. Chronic sore throats.

Esophogus damage. Esophogas rupture (100% fatal, severely painful).

Infertility. Miscarriages.

Brain damage. Bipolar disorder.

Serotonin deficiency syndrome. Chronic back pain.

Chronic bone pain. Heart attacks.

GAD; generalized anxiety disorder. Hypoglycemia.

Diabetes. Arthritis.

Ruptured colon (usually fatal). Loss of teeth.

Alopecia (baldness). Dry skin.

Skin disorders. Low blood sugar.

Rotting teeth. Pain in ribcage when breathing (caused by tight skin).

You are beautiful. Absolutely gorgeous. You never need to change your looks for anyone. You don't need to harm yourself for beauty when you already have it. I don't care how heavy you see yourself, you're gorgeous and perfect. Don't waste away for nothing. Don't you dare.

You're here for something. Food is here to eat. And gag reflexes are to prevent choking, not induce vomitting.

You have big things planned for you. You are amazing and so much stronger than imaginable.

You've got this, deer.